New Orleans Pelicans blasted by fiery Utah Jazz team, 133-109

Yikes — That’s me describing tonight’s drumming of a loss in a word.

The Utah Jazz entered the Smoothie King Center as one of the hottest teams in basketball and proceeded to beat the brakes off the New Orleans Pelicans, 133-109. It’s important to note Utah ranks 25th in the league in scoring so 133 points for them is like 300 points for other teams.

The Jazz got up big early on the Pelicans and led by double figures for the majority of the game. Even for a team that’s not the most potent group in the league, the Jazz have been of late and managed another collectively hot night as a team. Utah shot 58 percent from the floor, made 14 dang threes and only missed two free throws. Basically, they shot 100 percent tonight. Like they missed shots, but it felt like they didn’t you know what I mean?

On many a night, New Orleans would have skated by with 109 points, but once again, the Pelicans were dogged by their defense. They stunk, what more do I need to say?

If you’re into self-loathing, check out the Pelicans’ box score from tonight, specifically the plus/minus numbers. The starters all posted negatives in the double figures. Cheick Diallo and the corpse of Emeka Okafor joined them despite a lot fewer minutes.

God I miss DeMarcus Cousins.

I can give a small amount of credit to the Pelican starting backcourt: Jrue Holiday led the way with 28 points, Rajon Rondo had 18 points including four threes (I thought he couldn’t make threes???), and the pair combined for 11 rebounds, eight assists and three steals. Kudos or something for trying idk.

Nikola Mirotic got his first start at home and it wasn’t nearly as impressive as his debut in Minnesota. Mirotic only scored five points and was 2-8 from the floor. Anthony Davis had an underwhelming 15 and 11 night.

Look, the Jazz were awesome tonight. The Pelicans? Ehh not so much. For Utah, four of their five starters scored at least 18 points. That’s what we call “balance.” Rudy Gobert and Ricky Rubio each had double-doubles, 19 points and 11 rebounds and 20 points and 11 assists, respectively. I haven’t even mentioned Rodney Hood yet who is now wanted for murder by the city of New Orleans because he killed the Pelicans tonight: 30 dang points in 24 minutes.

Dag. Go away hot team and don’t come back. Ever.

The Pelicans have now lost four of five games since Boogie went down and postseason hopes are suddenly dwindling fast. Up next, New Orleans tries to right the ship at home against the Indiana Pacers before embarking on a three-game road trip.

Sigh. Geaux Pels?