FanPost

Are The Hornets The NBA's Least Tattooed Team?

The other day I was thinking of tattoos in the NBA, that lead to which team has the most tattoos, which I coucluded as either the Warriors or the Nuggets, but probably the Nuggs.  With the Hornets being my favorite team, I wondered if the had the least amount of tats, and so I decided to do some picture analysis to find out. 

 

 

Chris Paul: None visible.  CP3 doesn't strike me as the type to have a hidden tat, but I've been wrong about that before...

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  Marco Belinelli:  None visible.  Really, are there any white guys in the NBA with tattoos, I can only think of White Chocolate (Now Retired Jason Williams)and Chris "Birdman" Anderson, and both of them are drug-addled anyhow.

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Trevor Ariza:  Yes. Trevor wins the Most Tattoed Player on the Hornets Award, a much envied trophy, that made him the talk of the locker room.  Of course, Trevor did nothing to stir his teammates up, all he did was sit in front of his locker, smirking and carressing the ribbon.  Finally, Willie Green stole it, and DJ Mbenga used said ribbon as TP.

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David West:  Yes.  David is the only other Hornet with tattoos, that I can think of off the top of my head.    

 

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Emeka Okafor:  No.  Emeka seems to look more like a Chemistry Professor than a starting NBA Center.  I have never met a 7 foot tall guy who teaches Chemistry 101, but I'm sure he'd look like Emeka. 

 

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Jarrett Jack: No.  J-Jack has no visible tats, arms, neck, legs, anywhere, which leads me to believe that he has no tattoos.

 

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Willie Green: No. Willie reminds me of your local pediatrician, and there is an unspoken rule among pediatricians that you can't have any ink for that might scare the seven year old you are tending to.  Since Willie is a pediatrician, he doesn't have tattoos. 

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Carl Landry:  He doesn't have any tattoos.  Or teeth for that matter.

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Quincy Pondexter:  No.  Quincy Pondexter is another guy that looks like he would fit in just as well at your local elementary school as he would as an NBA player.  Q-Pon looks like a 3rd Grade teacher, and 3rd grade teachers have the same rules for tattoos as pediatricians do.  No. Ink.

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Aaron Gray:  Aaron Gray is an unathletic white guy.  He has no tattoos.  (I just demolished ppellico's street cred in two sentences)

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Patrick Ewing Jr:  No tattoos.  He's also as chill a bro as you can find, without tats.  A truly impossible feat.

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Jason Smith:  The same terms as apply to Aaron Gray, except with a slightly better jump shot.  And spiky hair.  And the middle name Victor.

 

 

 

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 David Anderson (Or Andersen, I'm not quite sure):  No tattoos.  The same terms as apply to Jason Smith and Aaron Gray, except even weaker and unathletic-er than those two.  And with an earring.  Wowzers.

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DJ Mbenga:  No visible ink.  Even though he's a DJ.  Don't all DJ's have tattoos and headphones???  My secure little world has been shaken...

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So, the Hornets only have two players with tattoos, which I think makes them the least tatted team in hoops.  Congrats, boys.  Hope you enjoyed the ride @TH'ers.

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